Broken Glass Page 5

  SYLVIA: Please. Be patient. I’m ... I’m trying. Relieved; a fresher mood: -Harriet says you used to take out our cousin Roslyn Fein.

  HYMAN, smiles, shrugs: It’s possible, I don’t remember.

  SYLVIA: Well you had so many, didn’t you.

  HYMAN: When I was younger.

  SYLVIA: Roslyn said you used to do acrobatics on the beach? And all the girls would stand around going crazy for you.

  HYMAN: That’s a long time ago....

  SYLVIA: And you’d take them under the boardwalk. Laughs.

  HYMAN: Nobody had money for anything else. Didn’t you used to go to the beach?

  SYLVIA: Sure. But I never did anything like that.

  HYMAN: You must have been very shy.

  SYLVIA: I guess. But I had to look out for my sisters, being the eldest ...

  HYMAN: Can we talk about Phillip?

  Caught unaware, her eyes show fear.

  I’d really like to, unless you ...

  SYLVIA, challenged: No!-It’s all right.

  HYMAN: ... Are you afraid right now?

  SYLVIA: No, not... Yes.

  Picks up the book beside her.

  Have you read Anthony Adverse?

  HYMAN: No, but I hear it’s sold a million copies.

  SYLVIA: It’s wonderful. I rent it from Womraths.

  HYMAN: Was Phillip your first boyfriend?

  SYLVIA: The first serious.

  HYMAN: He’s a fine man.

  SYLVIA: Yes, he is.

  HYMAN: Is he interesting to be with?

  SYLVIA: Interesting?

  HYMAN: Do you have things to talk about?

  SYLVIA: Well... business, mostly. I was head bookkeeper for Empire Steel in Long Island City ... years ago, when we met, I mean.

  HYMAN: He didn’t want you to work?

  SYLVIA: No.

  HYMAN: I imagine you were a good businesswoman.

  SYLVIA: Oh, I loved it! I’ve always enjoyed ... you know, people depending on me.

  HYMAN: Yes. -Do I frighten you, talking like this?

  SYLVIA: A little. -But I want you to.

  HYMAN: Why?

  SYLVIA: I don’t know. You make me feel ... hopeful.

  HYMAN: You mean of getting better?

  SYLVIA: -Of myself. Of getting ... Breaks off.

  HYMAN: Getting what?

  She shakes her head, refnsing to go on.

  ... Free?

  She suddenly kisses the palm of his hand. He wipes her hair away from her eyes. He stands up and walks a few steps away.

  HYMAN: I want you to raise your knees.

  She doesn’t move.

  Come, bring up your knees.

  SYLVIA, she tries: I can’t!

  HYMAN: You can. I want you to send your thoughts into your hips. Tense your hips. Think of the bones in your hips. Come on now. The strongest muscles in your body are right there, you still have tremendous power there. Tense your hips.

  She is tensing.

  Now tense your thighs. Those are long dense muscles with tremendous power. Do it, draw up your knees. Come on, raise your knees. Keep it up. Concentrate. Raise it. Do it for me.

  With an exhaled gasp she gives up. Remaining yards away ...

  Your body strength must be marvelous. The depth of your flesh must be wonderful. Why are you cut off from yourself? You should be dancing, you should be stretching out in the sun.... Sylvia, I know you know more than you’re saying, why can’t you open up to me? Speak to me. Sylvia? Say anything.

  She looks at him in silence.

  I promise I won’t tell a soul. What is in your mind right now?

  A pause.

  SYLVIA: Tell me about Germany.

  HYMAN, surprised: Germany. Why Germany?

  SYLVIA: Why did you go there to study?

  HYMAN: The American medical schools have quotas on Jews, I would have had to wait for years and maybe never get in.

  SYLVIA: But they hate Jews there, don’t they?

  HYMAN: These Nazis can’t possibly last—Why are you so preoccupied with them?

  SYLVIA: I don’t know. But when I saw that picture in the Times—with those two old men on their knees in the street ... Presses her ears. I swear, I almost heard that crowd laughing, and ridiculing them. But nobody really wants to talk about it. I mean Phillip never even wants to talk about being Jewish, except—you know-to joke about it the way people do ...

  HYMAN: What would you like to say to Phillip about it?

  SYLVIA, with an empty laugh, a head shake: I don’t even know! Just to talk about it ... it’s almost like there’s something in me that ... it’s silly ...

  HYMAN: No, it’s interesting. What do you mean, something in you?

  SYLVIA: I have no word for it, I don’t know what I’m saying, it’s like ... She presses her chest.—something alive, like a child almost, except it’s a very dark thing ... and it frightens me!

  Hyman moves his hand to calm her and she grabs it.

  HYMAN: That was hard to say, wasn’t it. Sylvia nods. You have a lot of courage.—We’ll talk more, but I want you to try something now. I’ll stand here, and I want you to imagine something. Sylvia turns to him, curious. I want you to imagine that we’ve made love.

  Startled, she laughs tensely. He joins this laugh as though it is a game.

  I’ve made love to you. And now it’s over and we are lying together. And you begin to tell me some secret things. Things that are way down deep in your heart. Slight pause. Sylvia-

  Hyman comes around the bed, bends, and kisses her on the cheek.

  Tell me about Phillip.

  Sylvia is silent, does not grasp his head to hold him. He straightens up. Think about it. We’ll talk tomorrow again. Okay?

  Hyman exits. Sylvia lies there inert for a moment. Then she tenses with effort, trying to raise her knee. It doesn’t work. She reaches down and lifts the knee, and then the other and lies there that way. Then she lets her knees spread apart ...

  Blackout.

  SCENE SIX

  The cellist plays, then is gone.

  Hyman’s office. Gellburg is seated. Immediately Margaret enters with a cup of cocoa and a file folder. She hands the cup to Gellburg.

  GELLBURG: Cocoa?

  MARGARET: I drink a lot of it, it calms the nerves. Have you lost weight?

  GELLBURG, impatience with her prying: A little, I think.

  MARGARET: Did you always sigh so much?

  GELLBURG: Sigh?

  MARGARET: You probably don’t realize you’re doing it. You should have him listen to your heart.

  GELLBURG: No-no, I think I’m all right. Sighs. I guess I’ve always sighed. Is that a sign of something?

  MARGARET: Not necessarily; but ask Harry. He’s just finishing with a patient.—There’s no change, I understand.

  GELLBURG: No, she’s the same. Impatiently hands her the cup. I can’t drink this.

  MARGARET: Are you eating at all?

  GELLBURG, suddenly shifting his mode: I came to talk to him.

  MARGARET, sharply: I was only trying to be helpful!

  GELLBURG: I’m kind of upset, I didn’t mean any ...

  Hyman enters, surprising her. She exits, insulted.

  HYMAN: I’m sorry. But she means well.

  Gellburg silently nods, irritation intact.

  HYMAN: It won’t happen again. He takes his seat. I have to admit, though, she has a very good diagnostic sense. Women are more instinctive sometimes ...

  GELLBURG: Excuse me, I don’t come here to be talking to her.

  HYMAN, a kidding laugh: Oh, come on, Phillip, take it easy. What’s Sylvia doing?

  GELLBURG, it takes him a moment to compose himself: ... I don’t know what she’s doing.

  Hyman waits. Gellburg has a tortured look; now he seems to brace himself, and faces the doctor with what seems a haughty air.

  I decided to try to do what you advised.—About the loving.

  HYMAN: ... Yes?

  GELLBURG: So I decided to
try to do it with her.

  HYMAN: ... Sex?

  GELLBURG: What then, handball? Of course sex.

  The openness of this hostility mystifies Hyman, who becomes conciliatory.

  HYMAN: ... Well, do you mean you’ve done it or you’re going to?

  GELLBURG, long pause; he seems not to be sure he wants to continue. Now he sounds reasonable again: You see, we haven’t been really ... together. For ... quite a long time. Correcting: I mean specially since this started to happen.

  HYMAN: You mean the last two weeks.

  GELLBURG: Well yes. Great discomfort. And some time before that.

  HYMAN: I see. But he desists from asking how long a time before that. A pause.

  GELLBURG: So I thought maybe it would help her if ... you know.

  HYMAN: Yes, I think the warmth would help. In fact, to be candid, Phillip—I’m beginning to wonder if this whole fear of the Nazis isn’t because she feels ... extremely vulnerable; I’m in no sense trying to blame you but ... a woman who doesn’t feel loved can get very disoriented you know? -lost. He has noticed a strangeness.—Something wrong?

  GELLBURG : She says she’s not being loved?

  HYMAN: No-no. I’m talking about how she may feel.

  GELLBURG: Listen... Struggles for a moment; now farmly. I’m wondering if you could put me in touch with somebody.

  HYMAN: You mean for yourself?

  GELLSURG: I don’t know; I’m not sure what they do, though.

  HYMAN: I know a very good man at the hospital, if you want me to set it up.

  GELLBURG: Well maybe not yet, let me let you know.

  HYMAN: Sure.

  GELLBURG: Your wife says I sigh a lot. Does that mean something?

  HYMAN: Could just be tension. Come in when you have a little time, I’ll look you over.... Am I wrong?—you sound like something’s happened...

  GELLBURG : This whole thing is against me ... Attempting a knowing grin. But you know that.

  HYMAN: Now wait a minute...

  GELLBURG: She knows what she’s doing, you’re not blind.

  HYMAN: What happened, why are you saying this?

  GELLBURG: I was late last night—I had to be in Jersey all afternoon, a problem we have there—she was sound asleep. So I made myself some spaghetti. Usually she puts something out for me.

  HYMAN: She has no problem cooking.

  GELLBURG: I told you—she gets around the kitchen fine in the wheelchair. Flora shops in the morning—that’s the maid. Although I’m beginning to wonder if Sylvia gets out and walks around when I leave the house.

  HYMAN: It’s impossible.-She is paralyzed, Phillip, it’s not a trick—she’s suffering.

  GELLBURG, a sideways glance at Hyman: What do you discuss with her?—You know, she talks like you see right through her.

  HYMAN, a laugh: I wish I could! We talk about getting her to walk, that’s all. This thing is not against you, Phillip, believe me. Slight laugh.—I wish you could trust me, kid!

  GELLBURG, seems momentarily on the edge of being reassured and studies Hyman’s face for a moment, nodding very slightly: I would never believe I could talk this way to another person. I do trust you.

  Pause.

  HYMAN: Good!—I’m listening, go ahead.

  GELLBURG: The first time we talked you asked me if we ... how many times a week.

  HYMAN: Yes.

  GELLBURG, nods: ... I have a problem sometimes.

  HYMAN: Oh.—Well that’s fairly common, you know.

  GELLBURG, relieved: You see it often?

  HYMAN: Oh very often, yes.

  GELLBURG, a tense challenging smile : Ever happen to you?

  HYMAN, surprised: ... Me? Well sure, a few times. Is this something recent?

  GELLBURG: Well ... yes. Recent and also ... breaks off, indicating the past with a gesture of his hand.

  HYMAN: I see. It doesn’t help if you’re under tension, you know.

  GELLBURG: Yes, I was wondering that.

  HYMAN: Just don’t start thinking it’s the end of the world because it’s not—you’re still a young man. Think of it like the ocean-it goes out but it always comes in again. But the thing to keep in mind is that she loves you and wants you.

  Gellburg looks wide-eyed.

  You know that, don’t you?

  GELLBURG, silently nods for an instant: My sister-in-law Harriet says you were a real hotshot on the beach years ago.

  HYMAN: Years ago, yes.

  GELLBURG: I used to wonder if it’s because Sylvia’s the only one I was ever with.

  HYMAN: Why would that matter?

  GELLBURG: I don’t know exactly—it used to prey on my mind that ... maybe she expected more.

  HYMAN: Yes. Well that’s a common idea, you know. In fact, some men take on a lot of women not out of confidence

  but because they’re afraid to lose it.

  GELLBURG, fascinated: Huh! I’d never of thought of that. —A doctor must get a lot of peculiar cases, I bet.

  HYMAN, urith utter intimacy: Everybody’s peculiar in one way or another but I’m not here to judge people. Why don’t you try to tell me what happened? His grin; making light of it. Come on, give it a shot.

  GELLBURG : All right... Sighs. I get into bed. She’s sound asleep ... Breaks off. Resumes; something transcendent seems to enter him. Nothing like it ever happened to me, I got a ... a big yen for her. She’s even more beautiful when she sleeps. I gave her a kiss. On the mouth. She didn’t wake up. I never had such a yen in my life.

  Long pause.

  HYMAN: And?

  Gellburg silent.

  Did you make love?

  GELLBURG, an incongruous look of terror, he becomes rigid as though about to decide whether to dive into icy water or flee: ... Yes.

  HYMAN, a quickening, something tentative in Gellburg mystifies: How did she react? -It’s been some time since you did it, you say.

  GELLBURG: Well yes.

  HYMAN: Then what was the reaction?

  GELLBURG: She was ... Searches for the word. Gasping. It was really something. I thought of what you told me—about loving her now; I felt I’d brought her out of it. I was almost sure of it. She was like a different woman than I ever knew.

  HYMAN: That’s wonderful. Did she move her legs?

  GELLBURG, unprepared for that question: ... I think so.

  HYMAN: Well did she or didn’t she?

  GELLBURG: Well I was so excited I didn’t really notice, but I guess she must have.

  HYMAN: That’s wonderful, why are you so upset?

  GELLBURG: Well let me finish, there’s more to it.

  HYMAN: Sorry, go ahead.

  GELLBURG:—I brought her some breakfast this morning and—you know-started to—you know-talk a little about it. She looked at me like I was crazy. She claims she doesn’t remember doing it. It never happened.

  Hyman is silent, plays with a pen. Something evasive in this.

  How could she not remember it?

  HYMAN: You’re sure she was awake?

  GELLBURG : How could she not be?

  HYMAN: Did she say anything during the ... ?

  GELLBURG: Well no, but she’s never said much.

  HYMAN: Did she open her eyes?

  GELLBURG: I’m not sure. We were in the dark, but she usually keeps them closed. Impatiently: But she was ... she was groaning, panting ... she had to be awake! And now to say she doesn’t remember?

  Shaken, Hyman gets up and moves; a pause.

  HYMAN: So what do you think is behind it?

  GELLBURG: Well what would any man think? She’s trying to turn me into nothing!